Healed But Still Hiding? - Letter 005

🪘 “A child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.” — African Proverb

Dear Daughter,

The bleeding had stopped. But she was still trying to disappear.

She had touched the hem of Jesus' garment. She felt the healing instantly. Twelve years of shame, gone in a moment.

But when Jesus asked, “Who touched me?” — she froze.

Because the issue was healed… but the identity wasn’t.

When the Issue Becomes Your Identity

Twelve years is enough time to forget who you were before the pain.

Enough time for sickness to become your story.

Enough time for shame to feel like your skin.

That’s what happens when the condition becomes your character. You start to believe:

• I am the divorce.

• I am the infertility.

• I am the failure.

• I am the woman who bleeds.

But Jesus didn’t just want her to stop bleeding. He wanted her to stop hiding.

And I know what that feels like.

Zawadi — the girl I once was — knew how to survive with a smile. She’s the heart behind Five Good Years, the memoir that traces how shame, silence, and spiritual exhaustion almost stole my voice — and how God gently, painfully, powerfully gave it back.

Zawadi learned how to earn love by performing.

How to hide shame beneath service.

How to show up polished while privately bleeding.

You can read more of her story — and maybe see pieces of your own — inside Five Good Years.

The outward breakthrough happened — the visible change came — but I still felt unseen.

Still questioned my worth.

Still carried the identity that pain had formed in me.

It took more than change to heal that.

It took a Saviour who could call me by name.

Why Jesus Called Her Out

He could’ve let her slip away. But He didn’t.

Because God’s power doesn’t just heal your body — it restores your name.

He called her out in public. In the same crowd that rejected her. And then He called her “Daughter.”

Not “woman.”

Not “formerly unclean.”

Not “the one with the issue.”

Daughter.

Because identity restoration isn’t complete until the inner name changes.

That’s what Zawadi needed. That’s what I needed. And if you’re reading this, maybe that’s what you need too.

Don’t Try to Fit Power Into an Old Identity

Some of us have experienced transformation — but we’re still showing up like we’re bleeding.

We pray with our heads bowed in shame.

We lead with our wounds tucked in.

We walk as if the miracle didn’t really happen.

But Jesus didn’t pour power into you so you could shrink back.

He gave you power so you could walk differently.

Talk differently.

Show up differently.

“God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.” — 2 Timothy 1:7

When you’ve touched Jesus — really touched Him — it demands a new identity.

🩷 Living Healed but Still Hiding

You don’t need to carry the residue of the issue. You need to carry the authority of the encounter.

💕 The Invitation

Have you been healed — but still hiding?

Has God moved — but shame still lingers?

Has the issue ended, but the identity remained?

Then this is your moment.

Let Him call you daughter again.

Let Him confirm you in public.

Let Him rewrite your story — not just in your bloodline, but in your bloodstream.

You are not the issue.

You are not the secret.

You are the one He called out… so you could finally come home to yourself.

Zawadi didn’t disappear.

She was absorbed into a deeper truth.

And I walk taller because of it.

🩷 Becoming Moves

1. Write down the labels you still carry that were formed in pain. Then ask: Who gave me this name?

2. Declare out loud what Jesus called the woman in Luke 8: “Daughter.”

3. Reflect on moments of breakthrough. Have you been living as if they never happened?

4. Ask God to reveal how you’ve been hiding even after healing.

5. Walk into one room this week with the boldness of someone restored.

🩷 Scripture Anchors

• Luke 8:43–48 — The woman with the issue of blood

• 2 Timothy 1:7 — “God has not given us a spirit of fear…”

• Isaiah 62:2 — “You will be called by a new name that the mouth of the Lord will bestow.”

• Joel 2:25 — “I will restore to you the years the locusts have eaten.”

• Psalm 34:5 — “Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.”

🩷 Call to Action:

💕 Start your identity restoration by downloading the free Identity Audit Toolkit.

💕 Ask yourself: Have I received healing but not yet stepped into identity?

You were healed to be revealed, not hidden.

Deutina

There’s glory on the other side of your hiding place.